From Angela to Target: Mainstreamin' Natural

You can find most things in Target. It's the serious one stop shop, but haircare has always been tricky for us Black girls. While in recent years, Target (and other stores) have expanded their Black hair care options, a few months ago I was thrilled to run into an endcap displaying a variety of brands of hair products for natural, "ethnic" curly hair. Pretty spectacular.

When I began transitioning about 3 years ago, going natural was still considered a revolutionary event. For me (in the heyday of my grad school, Angela Davis, bell hooks Black feminist glory*), it was about decolonizing the self - rejecting the imposed standards of beauty that have more Black women than not slathering a concoction of unknown, probably carcinogenic chemicals onto our heads every six weeks. It just stopped making sense to keep spending money damaging and stripping layers off of my God-given hair in an effort to have my sh*t bounce around like a white girl - because well, I'm not a white girl...and I like it that way (no offense to white girls, I hope they like themselves too).

I grew out the chemicals, did the big chop and have never looked back...and I've never had to. For Black women, going natural has gone from counter-cultural to mainstream and lots of us are selling out. It's a beautiful thing.

With the help of some cool-chick celebs and some crazy good new hair care products for curly, Black girl hair (Kinky-Curly, Miss Jessie's, Hair Rules, DevaCurl), going natural is getting easier, as is should (being "natural" and all). Imagine: Black women loving ourselves and embracing our hair just the way it grows out of our scalps...(still)revolutionary indeed.

*Perhaps more of a subtle version of this self, it is still my essence...no doubt.
**I love Amel Larrieux's hair (in the pic above)...one day *sigh*

The Natural Hair Care Routine - A work in progress...

One of my resolutions this year was to learn how to better care for my hair - and actually do it.

The routine (in theory):

Wash hair once weekly...
- LUSH's Rehab Shampoo (once a month)
- Allafia's Shea & Virgin Coconut Enriching Shampoo (sulfate free to use the remainder of the time)
- LUSH's American Cream Conditioner (for now, but I'm in search of an alternative)

In terms of styling products, I'm a fan of Kinky Curly's Curling Custard & Carol's Daughter Hair Milk

Because it's winter and my hair takes forever to air dry, I'm trying Curly Nikki's Twist-Outs. I like, but I miss my natural curls...warm weather needs to hurry it way up.

Bottom line: I love my natural hair!

Hair Resolutions, Relationship Games and Lipstick...

Today is henna day, so I'm stuck in the house with a thick brown paste plastered to my head for the next 1 1/2 hours (I've already passed 5 of them). Just me, myself and my thoughts - which I'm not doing a very good job of keeping track of. Perhaps spending so much time alone, doing not much of anything makes it hard focus. But anyways, my thoughts are all over the place today. I need to write and have spent the last few hours trying to decided what to write on and have finally drawn the conclusion that this afternoon's post will be a brainstorm of sorts. So here is me, streaming my consciousness....

I've been reading up on my natural hair blogs (there are some great one's out there) and it makes me proud to be one of the brave few. I'm hopelessly lazy with my hair though, so I think my 2010 New Year's resolution will be to learn more about caring for it. My hair is aight now, but it could be magnificent with a little more TLC...

Moving on...

Relationship games. I don't like them. Hate them actually. But if you don't play are you just, in essence, benching yourself in a game that you have no choice but to participate in? Why can't we all just be up front and honest? Why can't we just say what we mean, mean what we say, and ask what we want to know? I don't know why not. But apparently even I can't, so instead I construct a litmus test like game to determine where a certain someone stands - as to not have to ask the question (or have a discussion) outright. WTF?

Maybe (probably) games are just our way of navigating the murky waters of human relationships (particularly romantic ones) where there are so many rules and so many pre-constructed/conceived notions of gendered behavior. For example: so as not to appear clingy aka needy aka crazy I, as a woman, am wary to bring up questions that could be interpreted as wanting to define a new relationship. Supposedly compulsive relationship definition is a 'pathology' women in general are supposed to suffer from, right? In reality I know I'm not clingy, needy or crazy (quite the contrary actually) and I am pretty much okay with the non-definition that's going on and just simply want to know the answer to the question "are you into me, or not?". Why can't I just come out and ask it?

Oh, so many reasons...

1. I'm lame
2. I'm chicken and my ego is fragile
3. I don't really want to know
3. I'm afraid of being perceived as the "typical woman, always tryin' to trap a man" or otherwise overbearing or pushy because...
4. Direct woman are often misinterpreted as controlling, bitchy, dominating, etc...
5. I don't want to change the dynamics of the relationship - it's good now and a formal conversation on the matter might make it awkward
5. Games are easier and seemingly less risky


Jumping off...

I really want to find a flattering red lipstick. I'm in a red lipstick kind of mood. I wish MAC were closer, because I'd absolutely go and get a consultation today.

To me, red lipstick signals an easy and natural sensuality that I'm working on embracing. Red lipstick is less about putting things on than it is about rooting yourself in, because when you're wearing red lipstick - that should be pretty much it (on your face that is). It is simple in a way that a carefully constructed 'face' is not, yet much more assertive and much less apologetic. Bold. Daring. Classic. Feminine. Seductive. Blithe.

It's on.

Henna Adventures

I'm really, really lazy when it comes to my hair. I experienced a profound sense of disconnect when watching Chris Rock's film "Good Hair" because, as a Black woman, I am utterly and completely atypical. I spend about $10 to 20 a month on my hair and today, I decided to splurge a little bit on some Lush Caca Marron henna dye and I'm kinda excited about it.

I'm not expecting to get a whole lot of color from it, but it's suppose to give your hair a little bit more weight and shine. So, tomorrow (my day off), I'm going to embark on the labor intensive process of chopping, melting, applying, waiting on, washing out the henna.

Results TBA. I'll post an "after" pic.